Humbled

Well, for the past few days I have been really seeking God about some decisions I have to make. I must say that the past couple of weeks, Luke has been consumed with getting his resume out to a variety of schools and in turn, trying to wait patiently to see if anything opens up. Of course, our minds are wondering, ok, are we going to end up moving due to a job opening, is the Lord going to keep us here, etc. Then, last week I started thinking about how Luke and I working at Sumter last year was really a pretty good deal. We worked together, we had our lesson plans in place, etc. With that, we were making some decent money.

Well, this year, with me working at a private school, I have had to take a salary decrease. Then, Luke is not getting paid as much as he thought he would, because the school district has decided to make it difficult for Luke to get paid for a few years that he taught at the private school. Plus, since August, we have had to pay for medical insurance for Luke because his would not go into effect until December. So, needless to say, we have taken a pay cut thus far this year and really, it has not been fun. On top of that, we ended up having to get a new car because our Santa Fe decided to leave us with no engine! Life, what a journey.

So anyway, last week, I was like, maybe next year, I should just go back to teaching at the public school and with that, getting Nationally Board Certified. Teachers who are Nationally Board Certified can make an extra $5,000-$10,000 a year. Yep, that's right. Quite the increase.

Well, being at Foundation this week has really just made me enjoy where I am at. I just don't know if I would enjoy teaching middle school again, and I don't think I want to teach high school at the public school, especially after what Luke has gone through this year. So, being at Foundation this week, has just really made me want to stay there even though I am making less than what I would like to make. At Foundation, I am really having the opportunity to make changes for the better. And I really like that. Here's a note I got from my supervisor today:

Dear Jennifer:
I just wanted to tell you how great a blessing you are to me. I never have to worry about your class or that the children are being taught. Your work is always so professionally done. You are there whenever there is a need and I am very glad to have you in the secondary. Thanks for all you do. You are professional.

When I got this, it really lifted my spirits. It sure is nice getting encouragement every once in a while.

Another issue that I am dealing with is whether or not I should continue to do training with PTP-Pathway to Purpose. They are offering a level 4 and 5 training which in turn, will allow me to train other women. I would like to continue this trainning but of course, it costs money. And with that, I am just really seeking the Lord as to what he wants me to spend my time and energy doing. I have a desire to continue within the education field and at the same time, take part in ministry. I would LOVE to write either for magazines or to write a book at some point. But as we know, I really need to watch what I put on my plate. I work full-time, am working on my doctorate, and am actively involved with my church. So, I am really seeking the Lord as to what he wants me to do.

The other day, I asked some people to tell me what they thought my strengths were and what it is that I do well. I was overwhelmed by the response I got from a variety of people. Many "assessments" encourage you to ask people what they see in you because it allows you to realize where you are making an impact. So, here are some of the things my friends had to say to me (friends from the time I was young, college friends, seminary, and current friends from my church, The Crossing. I warn you, it's a little long:

Sold Out
Honest
Aggressive
Thoughtful
Caring
Strong
Relational
Passionate
Funny
Driven
Love people unashamedly
Model what I teach
Motivate others
Faithful
Great example of what it means to be a Christian
Open window letting the light shine through
Follow through with my great ideas
People know me at the Crossing
God's using me to touch lives
Charisma
Hospitable
Home is warm and welcoming
Glowing
Exude love, kindness, and sweetness
Organizer
Enjoy having a good laugh
Make people feel comfortable, at ease, and wanted
Dedicated
Disciplined
Friendly
Seeks to serve others
Serve people extremely well
Giving nature shines
People can count on me
Heart for people
Real
True friend
Teach/lead

Yikes!! I just could not believe the response I got. I was humbled. Doing this activity made me realize that the way you life your life really makes an impact. Going through this activity, I also realized more of how the Lord has gifted me and how the Lord may possibly want to use me within his ministry.

Also, going through all of this, has made me realize even more that money is not everything. And then, along with the encouragement that I have recieved from friends, I recieved encouragement from a student of mine with the post she made for my English class blog. And then, Cindie, a fellow PTP friend, posted on her blog about how so many times we can get caught up in the money trap. So, needless to say, I think the Lord may be trying to speak to me! I am realizing more and more that making more money, isn't what life is all about. I enjoy my job at Foundation, and I will still there until the Lord moves me. Yeah, I could make more money at a public school, but in reality, would I be fulfilled? I really don't think so. I think I would be miserable. I am also learning to just truly take one day at a time and to wait patiently for the Lord and his leading. Who knows what he has up his sleeve!

Ok, I don't even know if any of this makes sense, but for me, it sure was good to get it all out! Who knows, I may be the only one reading this! :)

Life in Review

Ok, so here I am reviewing the book, "The Cure for the Common Life" by Max Lucado that I read some time ago. As I go through, I reread the many points I highlighted such as:

"God gave you a zone, a region, a life precinct in which you were made to dwell. He tailored the curves of your life to fit an empty space in his jigsaw puzzle. And life makes sweet sense when you find your spot."

"When God gives an assignment, he also gives the skill. Study your skills, then, to reveal your assignment."

"Look back over your life. What have you consistenly done well? What have you loved to do? Stand at the intersection of your affections and successes and find your uniqueness."

"Whether your work at home or in the marketplace, your work matters to God."

"Your career consumes half of your lifetime. Should't it broadcast God? Don't those forty to sixty house a week belong to him as well?"

"God honors work, so honor God in your work."

"Your life has a plot; your years have a theme."

"Unhappiness on the job affects one-fourth of the American work force. One-fourth of employees view their jobs as the number one stressor in their lives. Seven out of ten people are neither motivated nor competent to perform the basics of their jobs. Forty-three percent of employees feel anger toward their employers often or very often as a result of feeling overworked. Fully 70 percent of us go to work without much enthusiasm or passion."

I don't know about you, but these phrases have really caused me to think. First off, to think about what my passions truly are. One of the things Max Lucado mentions is that we should often think back to our childhood and what some of the things were that we fully enjoyed doing. Ok, here are some of my things:

1) When I was like 5 or 6, I believe, I enjoyed telling my friends in the back yard that they were going to hell if they or their parents did not believe in God. Hmm, don't really see what this is saying about me that is GOOD!! Thank-God my mother overheard me and had a talk with me in regards to this not being the right way to talk with others about God. Well, I guess you could say that this kinda relates to me attending seminary and my desire to tell other's about Christ. Of course, without coming right out and telling people that they are going to hell. What was I thinking!! :) I guess that's why I also LOVED my mission trip to Venezuela for a month back in 1992 and am truly itching to go on another one!

2) My favorite gift as a kid was receipt books, play money, cash registers, etc. Hmm, still love this stuff! Weird, I know!

3) I loved playing business and pretending that I had my own business. I remember my friend Cori and I playingwhat we called JC Photo Shop. I LOVED it! I LOVED pretending that we had our own business and in turn, that JC stood for both Jennifer and Cori and that at the same time, it could stand for Jesus Christ. I really think that in many ways, I am an entrepreneur at heart. Maybe that's why I started Blooming Ministries. Who knows! The love for ministry combined with being an entrepreneur.

4) When I was little, I also loved playing school. I would teach to my stuffed animals. I had my own chalkboard in my room and what I would really love teaching is math because I was so bad at it. I would make up my own math terms. I remember while being in Elementary school, stealing chalk from my teacher for my own chalkboard (yes, mom and dad made me return it). I also remember hearing about textbooks that the school was throwing out and really wanting to get some for me to play school with. Lastly, I would also take the scholastic book order forms from the teacher's garbage so that I could use them as receipts, etc.
Can't imagine why I'm a teacher now!

5) Let's see, I also loved to sell things. I was one of those kids who always hit the neighbors up to buy stuff so that I could win stuff. I loved to seel things! I even would sell stamps at school, that is, until I got caught and was told I could no longer do that. Even to this day, I love to "sell" things to people. I actually have gotten quite a few people to purchase Disney annual passes so that they can come to Disney with us. Many people have also told me that I could sell anything!

6) Another thing I loved was giving things away. There were many times my mother had to keep me from giving away valuable toys! I find this interesting because I still really enjoy "giving" things to people and helping others in need.

So, I guess as I analyze my childhood, I can see many resemblences in how God used those childhood "fun times" to not only give me insight into what I was made for, but also, the way he may continue to use me in ministry. So, for those days, when I really begin to question my calling and what I feel as though I am to be doing in my life, I guess you could say that I can rest assured as to where the Lord currently has me and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Lord will continue to guide me into what he wants me to do.

Another point that Max Lucado makes is that when it comes to jobs, many times, "the problem might be less the occupation and more the outlook toward it. Before you change professions, try this: Change your attitude towards your profession."

I hope these thoughts and insight into my life, have encouraged you as much as it has encouraged me. The Lord knows what he's doing in our lives. If we keep our eyes focused on him, he will always guide us into that which he has called us to do and be.

Jen

God is Faithful

I can't believe it's Thanksgiving already! What's even more crazy is that Luke and I are hosting our parents and my brother this year! Luke and I have never cooked a turkey before!! Should be interesting! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

This morning at church, we had one of our members speak because Kendal our pastor, is out of town for the holidays. Randy (who has worked in church ministry before) talked about unbelief. The title of the sermon was, "Help my unbelief". It was incredible. He spoke about how at times, all of us have unbelief. He proceeded by telling us how his good friends who live in Nashville, TN are currently battling the news of their 2-year old son being diagnosed with Leukemia. They took little Joshua to the doctors to get some kind of cream that would take away the rash on his tummy and in turn, were told that Joshua most likely had Leukemia. Turns out, he does. He went on to talk about how so many times in our lives when we face trials and different circumstances that we would otherwise never place on ourselves, at times, it causes unbelief. Many times, we can be heard crying out to God asking him what in the world is going on. He went on to talk about how all of this is a part of the journey. He also spoke about Doubting Thomas and the father who took his son who was possessed by demons, to Jesus for him to heal. He then questioned us on what our "unbeliefs" are and what are fears are.

That's not such a great question one really likes to think about. I don't know about you, but I have my fair share of fears and at times, I wonder what it is that the Lord is doing in my life.
I have to admit, one of my fears is being diagnosed with some kind of cancer or sickness. What's interesting is that I used to never have any kind of fear like this. It's only crept up on me as I have gotten older. What really bothers me is it seems like constantly, there are news stories, radio shows, etc., that deal with all of these issues. There is only so much I can take. At one point, when Luke and I used to work together at the same school, we finally just turned the radio station off because all they would talk about in the morning were sad things, like diseases and such. Not really the way I wanted to start my day off. So yeah, that's a fear of mine. It's something that I have to daily, give over to the Lord and at times, not allow my mind to wander when I am not feeling to great.

Another fear of mine is this who school thing. Gosh, what is going to become of it? In today's day and age, in order to get a higher ed degree, you practically have to go into debt to do it, unless of course you have some money. Well, needless to say, when Luke and I are done, we will have accumulated some debt. That can be nerve racking. Luke and I HATE debt! But at the same time, we know that this was the direction we needed to walk in. So, that's another fear of mine-not being able to make means at some point.

Let's see, the third and last fear/unbelief is what in the world Lord are you going to do with Luke and I? Yes, we are teachers and we enjoy that (not always), but, is this really where we are going to be for the rest of our lives. I do have to admit, Luke and I do a pretty good job of taking each day at a time, but right now, Luke hates his job. He's teaching at a new school this year and really, it's just been horrible for him. And as a wife, the last thing I want to see is my husband coming home sad and upset and such because of his job. There is nothing more that I want then to see him enjoying his job. So, because of this job that he really wants to get out of, Luke is basically sending his resume everywhere. He is REALLY wanting to get into some kind of college job whether it be teaching or some kind of staff position. Well, as you know, Luke and I really like where we live. We REALLY like Clermont, we have some amazing friends, and our church is just everything we have always wanted in a church. So, the question that is left in my mind is, ok God, are you going to move us? What do you have planned for us? So, as Luke continues to send out resumes and such, we sit here waiting patiently to see what He does. The hardest thing is that if the Lord decides to move us, that's not always the easiest thing, especially when you feel like you have just recently gotten adjusted and such. I mean, we have just finished doing some great improvements to our house. I would love to enjoy those improvements and really, I REALLY like my house. I must say, Luke and I have done quite a job with it and apparently, that's what other people think too! Plus, we are involved in this terrific church which now a days, it's hard to find a good church. And lastly, we have made some incredible friendships through this church. I mean, these people would basically do anything for you. You can be real around them, you can be yourself and you know what, they still love and care for you. That too, is hard to find.

So, what I have to keep reminding myself is that this is all a part of the Journey. Yeah, I have my fears and doubts, but I must always remember how faithful the Lord has been to me in the past and remember always, that He is God, I am not, and he knows what is best for both Luke and I. As a little plaque in my house states, "God is Faithful". This, is what I must always hold onto.

Here we go again!

Hi Guys! Well, as you can see, I have had to start a new blog being that some of my students, or at least one that I know of, found my personal blog, and to tell you the truth, there are just some things I would like to keep personal. So, this will now be my new personal blog page! Check back soon for an update! Hope each of you are doing great!